annoyed, irritated, and rejected

I'm writing on this blog because I wanna write and vent, but I know no one reads this. I'm just so fed up with the male sex. I mean please, what is wrong with them?!?!

And what's most annoying is the way I can't get a certain one off my mind. It should be easy to do, half the time he's infuriating me. But there's something I can't let go of. I don't even know what it is. He's on my mind all day. And he's ignoring me. I don't know what happened, don't know why all the sudden he's paused/stopped communication. I'm not pursuing it though, cause it'll probably only annoy him. I guess one of us annoyed is better than both. Although i wish it was him and not me. I've been in a funk for a week. I don't see how it could just be from him, but nothing else is going on. So I guess I will blame him for it afterall.

And it gets worse. I can't even complain to my friends because one doesn't wanna hear it, I know, and the other is this certain someone's sister, so I know she REALLY doesn't wanna hear it. She knows about "us", I say "us" because there is no "us", but she doesn't want to be involved. So I'm trying to respect her wishes and not talk to her about it. So that leaves no one really to talk to.

He's not looking for a relationship. What does that even mean? I mean, who goes LOOKING for one, they usually just happen don't they? I guess he doesn't even want to let one happen. Whatever. Fine. I'm probably better off. Now if my heart and my head would just come into sync on this one maybe I could concentrate on other things and stop staring at my phone.

And not only is this not the first time this has happened in general, it's not the first time this has happened with this particular someone. Yes, yes I let myself get tangled up TWICE. Why? Because I'm a masochistic dope.

It's raining, at least the weather agrees with me.

MOVED

I've moved to a new site...

www.myspace.com/southerntwilightphoto

COME FIND ME!

Nooooothing new...sorry....but like yahoo mail I was afraid if I neglected it for too long it would just delete the whole thing. So this is my blog saving blog...to save...my blog.

Where did I go?

Well, I haven't used this blog in like, a trillion years. Mom says I need to start a column, perhaps I'll write a book. Anyway, I'm not using this anymore because, well I'm using myspace.

Soooo

www.myspace.com/kaylee185

Find me there. Lots of blog reading to be had.

Orrrr

Maybe I'll start writing my book on here. You'll just have to keep looking to see.

Blastoff!

So the countdown is complete. I'm leaving for Vegas tomorrow! Okay, well the countdown isn't complete, but it's below 24 hours so there's no need to really pay it any mind. I'm leaving work early to get my nails done...yes I'm sacrificing an hour of work to be girly. What of it?

A side not to add to the previous blog...The Road saga continues. So I'm walking through Melissa's house and I happen to look down at this shelf in the hallway that is usually stacked with phone books, paper, pencils, or whatever else happens to land there. And what had landed there this time? A copy of The Road. Melissa has never seen it in her house, I'd obviously never seen it there before, and yet there it was going "lookie!" So strange. I'm reading it, my copy, and it's actually pretty good. I'm intrigued.

Now for work time complaining. I have someone sharing my office with me now, and yes, it's still MY office. One, she smells like pepper (the seasoning). Two, she's about computer illiterate, so guess who gets to help her if there's a problem. And Three, she's a rat. I seriously think she's watching everything I do so she can report to our boss, and I don't even blame this one on my boss, I think this woman has made it her own private agenda. I had car trouble at lunch today so I was gone for an hour and a half. I was finishing up my lunch with the girls in another office and she walked by. When she walked by again she looks at me over the top of her nose and her glasses and just glares. I about choked on my buiscut. I IMed my boss to explain why I was gone so long just because I had a feeling the rat would be doing the exact same thing eventually, minus the explanation. It's a darn good thing I'm going on vacation tomorrow. Yesterday while I was at lunch she turned the light off in the office. I could barely see the numbers on the phone by the end of the day. I will start a light switch war if need be. I'm not shy.

I don't think I have anything left to share. There will be lots next week though. Stay tuned.

What was it I was thinking?

It's 9:30 and I'm already blogging...probably not a good sign. I don't even have anything to blog about. Life has been quiet. I've learned a lesson though (another one). If you tell your boss you're sick, when you're not, so that you can leave work early, chances are good you really won't feel good the next morning. Bad kharma. Or something.

In case anyone lost track of the Las Vegas countdown, it's now down to 7 days.

Okay, so weird story from yesterday. I saw that Jade was reading a book called The Road while writing his blog for Blaqk Audio (well, probably not at the exact same time). I was intrigued about what he might be reading, so I looked it up on Amazon. It was one of the top 50 books of 2006 and on Oprah's book list. It sounded interesting so I decided I was going to get it. So Melissa and I are in Target last night getting last minute Vegas necessities when my Dad calls. I stop in the middle of some cosmetic isle and start talking. I cannot walk around a store and talk at the same time. I kind of pick a spot and twirl around in it. It is impossible for me to continue shopping, because I walk around looking at things without actually looking and then I have to go back through it all again after I hang up. It's easier to stand still...relatively still, aside from the twirling. Anyway so I'm talking and twirling and I happen to glance across the isle at the scrapbooking and coloring junk...in the middle of this shelf full of photo albums, or table clothes, or something else completely asinine and random is the book The Road. I have never heard of this book, never seen it, and it's not new. Out of the hundreds of books that Target has, somehow that book wound up on the wrong shelf right in front of my face. Freaky huh? Well I thought so.

It's Wednesday today...I'm sure of it. But I checked the calander just then, to be extra sure.

Okay well, I'm off to do some work, or maybe color, whichever one seems more interesting to me...

Thursday: again and again and again

Alright, so I thought it was Thursday all morning on Wednesday. I even wrote 6/5 Thursday on something. So when I got a call to babysit on Friday I translated that in my head as 'I have to babysit tomorrow'. Alright, well I finally figure out what day it is...at least I did by the end of Wednesday and life is happy. Mind you, I'm still thinking 'I'm babysitting tomorrow'.

So now it finally is Thursday, for real this time. I leave work, waste an hour and a half in Hickory and then head over to babysit. After ringing the doorbell twice and standing in the sweltering heat for five minutes I call. "When was I supposed to babysit?" "Tomorrow. Are you standing in front of my house?" "...Yes." So that's how that goes.

That's not the end of the story. So I had plans Thursday night (the real Thursday) which I switched to the real Friday. Only I actually have to babysit on the real Friday, and it was too late to fix my plans on the real Thursday. Does that make any sense? Yeah well, think about how I felt.

So now it's Friday. I'm babysitting tonight...I think.